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We aren't religious, have more American values, and speak English first. I guess, for my family at least, we were never really "Mexican-American", we were more American than anything. I think that has to do with the church and their teachings of contraceptives. With young women too, becoming parents at any early age is seen as a accepted thing. I think a lot of the "Mexican-American" culture has placed waaaay to much emphasis on being macho for young men (movies, gang culture, etc). The things I learned from him where hard work (doesn't have to be laborious) and respects pay off. He was never pushy or forced use to be "macho". I saw my dad work long hard hours while being a home and building builder. I did read that one of the men mentioned in the article that he saw the hardworking macho men working in construction and farming. I am studying finance and have a really good career lined up once I finish and plan on doing my masters. My accomplishments are my defining factors. But I don't think that should be a defining factor in my life. My parents don't know that I am gay, yet. They got married in Texas, and had two kids. My mom was raised and educated in the United States, while my dad stayed behind to work on his family's farm. Both of my parents are from this little town in Nuevo Leon, Mexico. This whole machismo thing doesn't only exist in Latino families, it happens in all races and religions, but I am glad that it is slowly changing and hopefully one day it will be more acceptable in more cultures. I fear that they will look at me different and forget who I really am. I don't know what the future actually holds for me but my plan is to get a job, be independent for a few years and then hopefully "come out" and be accepted by my family and friends.
#MEXICAN GAY MEN TUBE FULL#
I do not want to live a life full of lies but there are many moments in my life that I have actually considered getting married to a woman and having kids. Even though I am not "out", I know that I want to live my life on my own terms. I know that they expect me to get married to a women and have children and continue the tradition. My entire family, both my mom's and dad's side has never been exposed to someone being gay, I guess they think it can't happen in or religious and somewhat conservative family. My parents were raised conservative and we have "none" gay people in our family, even extended family, that I know of. I am 22 years old, just graduated college, currently seeking employment and living with my parents in NYC.
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This article put a few things in perspective to me as a gay Latino man in the closet. I'm glad I read this article because it gives me a view on the bullet I somehow narrowly missed. That is a LOT more than other gay Latinos can say, and I hope to whatever God there may be that I can share the bit of peace I found with them. Thus, the overall impact and tl dr of my post is that when I grew up out of machismo and, because of my homelife and mom having to support us, grew up on my own, I made an identity I have come to terms with. I rock long hair and I love my high pitched voice. I'm weak-bodied and thin, I cry whenever I feel the need (which can be often if I'm not careful), I share my happiness and delight with others, and although it sounds selfish and egotistical I really enjoy when other guys call me cute. So, a lot of the machismo guidelines I never followed. My mom being strong and supporting us as best she could, my sister's getting ready for school every morning, my brother having problems with my mom every so often because tofl teenagers. Mind you I never started wearing dresses or anything, but I just made my own opinions on gender roles based on my own processing of my environment. No one in my family pressured me to be overtly masculine, and I never really felt the need. Thus, the clear Latin machismo kind of just skipped me over. The only real male figure I had in my life was my brother, but he was in high school and had his own shit to deal with. I would say this is probably key to my growing up because none of us really had fathers or male role models in our lives, positive or negative. My family life isn't truly unique, but basically everyone in my group of siblings is technically only half related. I am Mexican American, I grew up in Orange County, and I realized I was gay as soon as puberty started messing with me. I also feel like I have a unique perspective on the situation.